Only Fatimah knows about it. And how i'm feeling.

It really sucks.

My head is going a bit haywire it's making me a little kuku.

manymany things are happening

Summarising by day -

First MLB lesson on Monday. The paper is chicken shit easy. But I still failed the close passage section. I'm hopeless -_-

Went to the subordinate courts on Wednesday. They detected my camera in my bag using the scanner they use in airports and I had to leave it at the counter :( BUT! We sat in the electronic courtroom which is super cool while being informed on courtroom protocol.

THEN! The nice lady let us sit through a hearing. So exciting right! And guess who's hearing it was? Everyone knows who he is!

T.T. DURAI! COOL SHIT RIGHT? HEHEHEEHEHE!

When we came in, all 18 (i think) of us, we made a bit of a racket with our bags which kinda disrupted the proceedings, which made everyone turn around including the accused himself, sitting in THE box.

I swear.
His stare.
Is.
PURE EVIL!

He turned around and looked at each and everyone of us, brow furrowed, and had a slight frown. In fact, his entire face looked like a giant frown. And evil alien-like eyes. It was a damn boring hearing, almost all of us were gonna fall asleep. They were speaking so softly, with many pauses so the typists can catch up. Sharon fell asleep, and the police guard at the door told Ms Lim to wake her up. LOL!

After about 30 mins, we left. Before the hearing started, and way before it ended. So we dunno the verdict. In fact, we didn't even know what the hearing was about! HAHA!

The tour lady was wearing the elven necklace from LoTR! OMG! I recognised it immediately and... I want it. Haha.

After that, we ate dinner at Vivo. The rest went to Daiso while me, Fizah, Fad and Samu walked around the outdoor area, and we reached the pool-thingo! Within 5 minutes our shoes were off and we were splashing around happily like deprived kids. Samu kept splashing Fad and Fizah and almost splashed me if I wasn't yelling that I was holding on to my camera.

Ryan came and joined in later after Daiso. We were practically soaked after that, so we went to the toilet to dry ourselves. I wasn't intending to dry myself cause I wasn't that wet, until I turned and saw the reflection of my butt.... and my cartoon underwear was showing! OMG!

I HATE the school skirt! As in.... its THIN-NESS. I can't wear any of my stripey/cartoon underwear cause its clearly visible through the skirt. I also had this incident about being too patriotic and... stripes. All too traumatising to recount.

I just bought motherfucking bright orange and blue undies the other day. Looks like I can't wear them to school :(

Dental tomorrow! And maybe lunch with Mimi! Yay!

prom signup.

Normal people state their food preferences as Chinese, Halal, or Vegetarian.

TPJCians, on the other hand, do it like this:


































Click on them LAH.

So the April babies kickass partay has been postponed to the 21st of April. Cause council camp's from the 13th to 15th. Bledy shit man. I have to admit it feels a TAD weird to be celebrating 19 days after my birthday, but fuckit. I don't care. Hehe. And those who are invited... will be INVITED. As in... i'll ask you. I don't have that many people to invite though HAHA.

Bahluls yours is COMPULSORY ATTENDANCE. DON'T COME AND YOU DIE break my poor little heart.

Multiracials, you guys also come. But, being in a party of over-enthusiastic JC students might get on your nerves. You have been forewarned. There will be idiots drinking and stupid dancing and the works.

Ya so. Failed econs terribly today. To think I studied. Rarrggghh..

300 posts yay!

So it's confirmed. Zahra, Rish and I will be having our giant combined birthday partay on the 14th, at night at some condo in Mountbatten. Haha, so fun! I've never had a huge birthday, and i'll probably be the most discreet birthday girl out the three, so it's all good.

Yesterday the 3 of us went to check out the Study in Australia/UK fair at Suntec City. So the reality of it all is that I need to push up my grades to a minimum of AAB and try and get a scholarship otherwise my parents will be paying through their nose. Feels quite shitty. AAB? At this point i'm really wondering. It's like an A Level dream come true for everyone.

Someone, anyone in this world who has it, PLEASE send me Jenna G's NYC. I've been listening to her MySpace snippet over and over and I just want the whole effin' thing already.

Wednesday's 06S02's learning journey to the subordinate courts. In Havelock Road. In bledy Chinatown. So me and Fatimah have to scrap our plans of going to Far East plaza, and have decided to explore Chinatown instead. Kenneth and Samu were going on and on about how they wanted to wear a white wig, bring a big hammer and storm the place. If we're lucky, we get to sit through a hearing though it's unlikely. So Samu suggested someone go commit a crime.

I think that even though I have less wholesome things to do in J2, apart from studying, my JC life is getting quite exciting. And for the birthday partay? My 'super-sweet-16th' bimbotic self is starting to show. I'm trying very hard to restrain myself, after all, we're FAR from loaded. But hey, I just want it to be kickass.

Looking up teen/adult party games now. Ooh hahahahahaha :D

aww...

I wish I could sleep now.... And die.

People commend me for having the ability to just shut off. But what goes on in my head in the process.. It's like a raging battle, fighting to calm myself down amidst the chaos.

Why must my house be so chaotic? Why can't it be calm like all the other houses in this street?

I swear I was born into the wrong family. Everyone is so explosive, so vocal. Nobody would rather chill, relax, talk things out.

Wahhh. :(

contemplation

Was away at the 21st Council's chalet for 3d2n from the 14th to the 16th.

It was alright, the turnout was way better than any council barbeque we've ever had. And we bonded... somewhat. Haha.

Things are getting rocky again at home, but it won't kill my happiness from having completed all my homework :D:D Sat down for a few hours on Monday and just worked away before and after Desperate Housewives. I still have a bit more but it's not due on Monday so whatever.

I really need to get an external hardrive to keep all my photos. Anyone know where I can get a good deal? I need a bigger microSD card for my phone too.

I dunno why but blogging now feels like such a chore. I can't say nothing's bugging me. But I just hate this feeling.

It really bites. When you feel so free and light-headed from the temporary weight off your shoulders, and how it whips back and smacks you in the face the moment you step into your house, your inescapable reality. It's a reality you've tried to hard to avoid, tried so hard to fix and now try even harder to stay out of its way. Sadly, nothing works.

I think I have too much free time to think. Haha.

EHH SHIT LAH!

I think I ate too much Long John Silver's batter today cause my tooth is chipped. CHIPPED! I feel like a hobo.

The only reason why it's chipped is cause the dentist enlarged the teeth beside my front two teeth. To make it more even I guess. So it's still fragile. BUT WTF! EATING LEH. I wasn't chewing bledy rocks or anything.

And I made a very grave mistake with footwear yesterday. You see, certain types of footwear you wear with skinny jeans can make or break the way you look.

I wear 3/4 pants most of the places I go, so wearing the fake birkies Primela bought me for christmas looks just dandy.

Yesterday was Aresha's birthday, so I thought, hey! I think I shall wear my brand new skinnies today cause i've been dying to wear them. I was the last to leave the house and in a rush to meet my family, so I quickly grabbed Ash's medication, grabbed my birkies and brisk-walked my way down. Only for me to realise halfway that I looked like A MINAH! OH MY GOD!

OH MY HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHIT!

I got weirddd stares from mats at Simpang Bedok. I have NEVER felt so uncomfortable in what I was wearing in my entire life.

So from now on, I shall wear my skinnies ONLY WITH HEELS and nothing less. Grrroar.

And that means i'll have to buy a pair of heels haha.

Oh and to make things worse? I brought the D70S with me and put it in the brown sling bag Maya gave to me for my birthday manymany years ago (it fits a DSLR perfectly!) and slinged it.

So sling bag (usually some fake brand one) + bo-chap slippers + tapered pants = minah.

But.

Sling bag (containing D70S) + black birkies + mango skinnies = One cool-ass person who dressed like a minah by accident.

Shoe shopping, anyone?

royally fucked

Tomorrow I will get screwed in the ass by my math faculty test. Oh jesus. Fucking up my math paper... oh well. At least I took some nice photos this weekend to make up for the not-studying :D

Hmm. Am feeling extra Bebel Gilberto today. I wanna change my blog layout to look something like Norah Jones's new video, Thinking about you. Because I need someone to think about.

Lovely sky in the morning.
































A bunch of leaves, nothing particularly interesting. I think this picture is the stupid tree top walk in a nutshell really.
























Aww.

















This monkey's like :D

And... my personal favourite.
















Dunno why I like it so much also. Feels like there's some deep underlying meaning to it but aiya. I just like it ok. Shetap.

i survived!

Yes. I survived the stupid walk on the third day of the red tsunami. Gah, it was quite a waste of time. Photographers (chey) don't like to be rushed. So much for a tree top walk. It was a 1km walk TO the bridge, a 20 minute wait to WALK ON the bridge (they regulate the number of people on it at a time), a super short 250m stretch of bridge with absolutely no nice view of anything, and more than a 1km walk back in the hot sun.

But I got some really nice photos. The 300mm lens is nothing short of wonderful :D

On a lighter note, I finally ate at Mos Burger after so long! Chang Yuan and I were starvin' marvins after being sent back to school. Had the most interesting conversation afterwhich he made the macho decision to grow some balls and pierce his ear.

So we went up to 77th street and my $50 stripey jacket is still there! But in black and white.... oh man I want it but 50 yollars is ouch considering how much I spent the month before.

His reaction to the stud going in was hilarious. It was a spasm and delayed shock. And it took him awhile to realise he didn't need to worry about taking the stud out on the first week cause it's the school holidays! Yay!

My days next week are packed. Monday - test and lessonsssss. Tuesday - going out to shoot some photos and maybe go to JB, not sure.

Wed-friesday - COUNCIL CHALET BABY! It's gonna be so much fun. I think we're going out on the first night. Where? No idea. I have a feeling theres alcohol involved.

And EVERYONE is looking forward to seeing me drunk this year, after last year's council chalet escapade. They still make fun of me about it till now.

"If I can't catch the slipper i'm not drunk"
Desmond throws the slipper and it flies right between my hands while I fumble retardedly.

I didn't catch the slipper. And it's the biggest joke in TPJC that's lasted so long. Oh man.

Okay I need to open the gate for Aresha's birthday surprise from Celine. Lol.

HAHA. I told her someone's doing something to her car and she jumped RIGHT out of bed and ran out. Then she saw Celine haha it was pretty funny.

i'll be walking in the treetops tomorrow

Really. Did you know there's a suspension bridge at canopy level in Singapore? I remember Mon asking me that, and I said I have no idea. And i'll be going tomorrow! Yay!

The best part - I have the D70! With a 300mm lens (its zoom is so the powderful its like a spy lens)! So maybe I can take some cool birds or something. Going with Chang Yuan so even though a certain someone nobody likes from my class is going I already got him to swear to stick with me so it won't be so bad.

Walking among the treetops... Interesting eh? Can't wait. But I gotta be in school by 7.15am tomorrow. Unbelievable.

Hehe. Would've been a great weekend if it weren't for a goddamn test on Monday and almost a full day of school after that when it's a HOLIDAY.

haha... you don't say.

Heh.

Oh and Tyra Banks is a nutcase. I've never quite liked her.... now I think she's retarded. And I still don't like her.

Need proof?

"YOU get vaseline and YOU get vaseline and YOU GET VASELINE!!! AAAAAHHH!!!"

I was having a miserable Friday, after receiving my shit results, facing my bawling seniors whom I had known for a fact that they mugged their butts off and still did badly, then dragging my ass home to study for the god damn econs test, Ma told me Aresha's car would be coming today.

Her Mazda MX-5. Ripped the picture off her blog.


















It's really cute and REALLY small. Not exaggerating here. You can't fit more than two medium built people in it. We took it to get blessed/christened at the temple in Katong. The priest was larger than my grandmother and that's really saying something. He had to sit in the driver's seat to throw petals all over the dashboard and make markings with a mix of powder and water and it got all over the speedometers.

Watching him trying to get into the car was... amusing to put it lightly. Respect respect.

Aresha had to walk a round around the car with a coconut with lighted camphors on it. The coconut then caught fire halfway and all the commotion of coconut breaking after that led Ash into thinking that he was supposed to break the coconut on the car. Of which he almost did, very eagerly.

I prayed very hard for my A levels. Very very very hard. Cause the shock from the MTL results and the looks on the faces of my seniors have paralysed my brain for awhile. Which is amazing because I probably have never prayed that hard in my life, in a temple nonetheless, since I was a kid thinking God would make all my wishes come true. Only for it to fuck up nicely and if you asked me to pray about this time 4 years ago I would've hissed and spat like a pms-ing cat.

Then I prayed for my family. Also very hard. For Aresha to get a great job, for Ash's stupid behaviour to improve, for my dad to stop acting like a goon and for my mom to stay the way she is.

I know how I used to complain ALL THE TIME about my mother. But towards the end of last year she's really made an effort to change not only for herself but the whole family. And I quite like the new her. She sets boundaries within reason, and knocks me on the head (verbally now that i'm older haha) when i'm spiralling the wrong way. But how much you wanna bet i'll be complaining about her again? Haha.

Back to the car. It looks nice and all, but I think the $100k was all for aesthetics. It's far from top-of-the-line that's for sure, cause sitting it in was like sitting in a very thinly-padded car seat... and the seats weren't thinly-padded. You could feel every bump in the road.

The sound system is awesome. DNB sounds so much better in that car. But when the hood is up, you STILL can hear almost every single sound outside the car. As if the hood was down. No sound insulation whatsoever. The hood isn't automated either, so you gotta detach it and push it down yourself.

But... oh well. It's a nice car.

It says 6668 jr in the photo cause my dad actually bid for a 6668 plate to match the cefiro. So now we have a nice procession of black 6668 cars. Cool shit. I'm getting my license first thing after my 'A' Levels hehe. MWAHAHA!

I do not understand. Why TPJC insists on re-testing the same god damn topics over and over. How can we start our bledy revision if you're gonna make us mug for the same topics over and over? Retards.

cheer all those who despise me at my misery

Ungraded. Failed it. Not even a goddamn sub-pass, the bare minimum to enter a local university. I thought SEAB was nice to people and just let them pass. Heck, a freaking sub-pass, which is still a fail. But no, un-fucking-graded.

Ahh. Suck shit, Malay Language.

So here's how it'll go. I can either (a) retake it at 'A' Level in the middle of the year or (b) drop to ML B, attend about two periods of it a week, and sit for a chicken feet paper at the end of the year.

I'd go for (a) but the thing is... I didn't pass this time around, what are the odds i'd be able to pass the next time round? Then it'd just be a waste of 6 periods a week... maybe even for the rest of the year. I might just die.

As for (b), it's a definite 2 periods a week till the end of the year, and i'll sit for the apparently damn easy paper. Passing that will be a minimum to enter a local university. So I vouch for (b).

God damn it.

malay.... a level... results... out.... TOMORROW! AAAHH!

Please please please whoever is up there watching, please let me pass. Please let me be rid of this second language that i've hated since I was a kid and had to put up with 13 years of its crap.

Hear my pleas. You KNOW you want me to be rid of it. Hearing me speak malay is like listening to nails across a chalkboard.

Everyone's been wishing me luck though :)

Damn it I haven't studied anything today. But I should take a break, been mugging for econs the past 3 days. Rarrrrgh so many tests next weeeeek! Gonna die soon. Good thing is that council chalet's during the March hols, so if my mom's in a good mood she'll let me go!

So. Wish me luck for tomorrow. If I don't die from anxiety before that.